I’m proud to be weird

memo to all who comment: thnks for commenting man ….though would really appreciate if u commented on my frequent entries rather then my intro page…so weird…i just intro myself onli…not tat i'm sensitive abt being weird…i m weird n proud of it XD…so yah…thnks for comments…

honestly…i felt so proud of myself (ok, ok, "happy" can?) of yesterday's entry…i can feel my nonsense returning to me..

i wanted to put the post i did at work today online…but i kinda got lazy…n here's a summary of it (learnt tis frm some guy…u noe who u r) i wrote abt how going to orchard was better than going home (so many decisions to make while going home)…collecting of my new passport n at the same time being upset tat i will prob not use it to get to jap this year…n made find of my fren who says weird stuff…

anw…talkin abt weird…i tink my whole family is…runs in the family i guess…here's a breakdown…going by age…my dad can take frm morning till afternoon to read the newspaper n will only clean the house when everyone is home when he could have done it during the 12 hrs the rest of us r out……my mom is lame…no, she didn't break any of her legs…but her mouth can break ppl's jaws (ppl laugh too much at her lame jokes, some courtesy of me …)…then there's my cousin…in the last AGM of the church…he raised his hand to propose the continual of a particular auditor company…tinking tat "propose" was "goalpost"!…stupid world cup…see wat u doing to my bro…u affect others nvm…don't u dare touch my bro……then there is me…u already noe how i m…then there is my little cousin…yes, the one with the chao da egg tart…but he is more of wacky than weird…….so there u have it…

currently…i m literally dying to go to macau…i want to get out of the country in my last weeks of holiday…subsequent years have attachment…i can forget abt travelling…haiz…y?! Y?!….Japan…so near yet so far…y?! y?!….Ikitai na XO….

Non-kid-non-teen-non-adult-non-elderly? Then wat?!

So so so so sorry…for not updating…aiyah…sorry to u for wat?…my own choice whether to put tings online wat…anw…there were 2 reasons as to y I did not put any entries for the past week…

One…I've been having mood swings…previously only my mother noes cos I didn't intend to tell anyone…n the fact of hving to put it online may bring along a bit of trouble…esp if the person noes I m referring to him or her…if u didn’t notice I had mood swings…means I'm quite good at hiding it n not letting other ppl get affected (yo man!)…if u did…u must be as sensitive as I am (so proud to hv an identical twin with me…erm…nvm)…

ok…reasons for mood swings…to sum it up….it's basically too many ppl are climbing over my heads just becos I do not retaliate or tat I'm too nice…not tat I'm always nice (I, myself will noe abt myself)…but sometimes ppl just go overboard…during last week…I had one day in which I kept askin myself wat is being nice and how I could be nice without the urge to worry if the next person I'm nice to is gonna climb over my head again….haiz…but I'm glad God helped me hold my tongue such tat I won’t sprout nonsense frm my mouth (I realized tat I get very sarcastic n mean when I'm angry…I guess I'm not the type to scold or put on a black face…so I had to pray to the Lord to make sure I do not say athg offensive…)

Actually I did say sthg slightly offensive yesterday…n I felt soo….bad abt it….really sorry to my president…I didn't mean to say those words…even if u don't remember wat I said…ah!!!!….conscious hitting me where it hurts…*pain*…*pain*

Ok…second reason…I can't quite differentiate between copyright and non-copyright stuff anymore…so I get worried if wat I write on the entry is gonna attract legal actions (tentatively, a non-kid-non-teen-non-adult-non-elderly person like me does not have the $$$ to support or hire a lawyer…not to mention coming b4 the judge and getting my mom overworried (she tends to scold when she is worried…like all moms…imagine wat happens when she is overworried )……but I figured tat as long as it has nthg to do with religion, culture and Singapore politics…I guess I should be alright…

Actually there is a 3^rd reason…frm my mom…saying tat some tings I post online might offend ppl or associate me with ppl tat I do not want to be associated with…then I was like “ HUH?! Then I cannot write athg liao lah…” …so…hope u guys will understand if u cannot understand wat I'm writing…it's to protect the safety of u guys and myself (knowing tat if I wrote sthg that u guys didn't like…u will be smashing ur heads on the pc screen panels…so I'm tryin to save ur lives here)

And…just to end…I'm still upset (can't used “pissed off”cos it is an immature word for a non-kid-non-teen-non-adult-non-elderly person like me to use) tat I cannot join Ignite for tomorrow's outing…sad man!!!

One year older really makes a difference…

it's now been 9 days since i'm 20…this is prob a number tat u can no longer associate urself as a teen…nor n adult…since in singapore u r only recognised as an adult when u are 21…so it's more like a cross road in which u can turn neither left nor right…

but yet i'm glad to say that these 9 days (ok, more like only yestereday)…i've learnt things tat would really come in handy for my days to come…u may call it a step in adulthood…or may i just woke up…it's hard to say…but like my mom always say…if such things don't happen…one can never understand wat it means to be under such conditions…

to start off…sthg nice tat i learnt was abt God n His creations…i was at the "Arise!" concert held at the Expo yesterday…i would say the targetted audience is more of the kids (but hey, we r all kids of God)…n it was there tat i truly realised tat God really has a lot of ppl He can choose to do His work…every child on tat stage yesterday were all filled with God's love…every one of them has the potential to work for God…tat's y u should always make use of the opportunity to serve…i always assumed tat young children cannot understand the work of God…but tat theory of mine was totally thrown off!…God had given these children images in their mind…one said tat all nations will praise Jesus…one said he saw heaven n hell…n there i'm standing…wondering y i was unable to see (a bit sad..but prob it's on my part for not-willing to see, i think)…the songs sang were all simple songs…similar words were repeat over n over again…but yet they touched my heart…i couldn't stop cryin…it seems tat the Lord's love had filled tat whole hall (the hall is really big, like PC show big!)…initally i felt shy tat i'm the only one cryin n i tried my best to wipe my constantly dripping-wet face…till i saw tat my aunt was cryin too did i feel more relaxed…God was definitely there

on the otherhand…i realised tat as a Christian…i worry too much…my fren say tat i tend to make ppl's problems become my own…which usually stresses me out…n it was only as if during the past few days did i truly understand wat she meant…at this pt…i feel tat i'm really an idiot (don't worry, i'm not gonna jump off a building…i'm doing reflection)…being so gullible n all…n my aunt just told me yesterday…be nice, but be wise at the same time too…guess i was not wise…haiz…initally i was more upset at the people whom i assumed (yes, i made an a** of myself) were cooperative…but i learnt i should be upset myself for being so gullible…but i learnt my lesson…n i will be careful frm now on…i'm 20…n i guess i should start acting like one…

yet…i have a pt to cheer up cos yesterday's jc class gathering was a great success…n i had so much fun with my classmate (sad to say, not the guys)…but yeah…everyone was still the same…n i'm glad tat out of all the events to choose frm…i chose this…not yet all the others were not good (they are good, honest!…serial!)…but i know this was the only event tat will truly cheer me up

The REASON why God gave u eyes to see…

i can’t believe tat i have to WRITE (literally) today’s entry at work…just becos i 4got to bring the thumbdrive to work…sigh…nvm…just make do with rough paper…

ouran ep 9 (sorri i did not keep track of it on my blog) made it’s way to my PC yesterday…yeah!!!…it was a totally silly episode…on the otherhand, still very nice …i’ll be expecting my junior to go @*/”£&*^ or sthg like tat…but don’t worry…those are not bad words…they r more of squealing and screams of joy…lord knows where tat voice of hers is coming frm…

oh yes…here’s a challenge tat you might wanna try out…in honor of the visually handicapped ppl (cannot use the B-word…too sensitive…or issit? ) try standing on a crowded bus (make sure there r no seats available, cos if there is go sit so as not to block others) with UR EYES CLOSED and do it for abt 10 mins (if on an expressway, try 20 mins)…if u can do it without opening ur eyes AT ALL…congrats n good for u…now move aside…

as for those who CANNOT…just make sure u give up ur seat (provided u r sitting in the first place) for all the visually handicapped buddies…always…for unlike you, they cannot “open” their eyes to prevent themselves frm falling…

ok…now tat u’ve learnt sthg new…it’s time to ask urselves…is tat really sthg new…or have u been ignorant?…

Construction is making…

Erm…I do not quite have athg constructive to write abt…except to tell u abt mistakes in my blog…haha…suan-ing myself…so weird…anw…I was thinking tat my blog was getting a little monotonous…n I write stuff which ppl find hard to comment abt…-_-!!! …nvr knew it was tat disappointing but oh well…

U noe how the whole idea of a blog is to allow ppl to read online…like an online diary…yet sometimes…I wished I kept my fingers away frm the keypad long enough till the urge to write sthg bad stopped…guess I wasn’t thinking too much to begin with…I had the image in mind tat very few ppl will ever attend to the daily repetitive n nonsensical lameness I wrote (though not all the time n excluding all parts with God in it)…seems support for the blog is growing…woah!!!

At this moment…I pondered over wat I could put down…sthg tat would be constructive n useful…nthg came…considering I usually don’t say constructive things…XD…yah…the lameness still persists on…no, wat I meant was I had a lot to write abt…but most seemed inappropriate…(like I said…very hard to control fingers on certain topics so best not to type them down)

Btw…I’m not in any case feeling downcast…it’s more of tiredness…cos I just ate my lunch…a bit too heavy I guess…a temporal brain freeze…or a food block if u will…haiz…wake up my idea man!!

Oh yes!…I went with my junior to watch X-men yesterday…yes…it’s the one where not-so-real-fans of X-men will say it was good…while Prof X’s fans would be screaming their heads off…WHY HV TO KILL THE PROFESSOR? (yeah…so I’m one of those -_-)…let me explain wat I thought went wrong with the film…let all be known tat these are my personal opinions n no matter wat I say…the Hollywood crew r still making money out of the blockbuster (assuming it was/is a blockbuster…*shrug*)…

One…the so-called new character Angel has barely 10 mins of presentation…yet he is on posters all over (yes…I understand the need to publicize a new guy)…with my junior going all gu-gu-ga-ga over him…

Two…they (producers) had to go kill Cyclops n Prof X…not tat I bothered if Cyclops died…but they were basic main characters…ppl who should stay longer on screen do not…n those smaller frys have longer screenplay…ah!!! Cannot go on!!!

There u hv it…my view on the latest X-men movie (I noe ppl’s faces r going “wat-the?”)…I’m no movie critic (I noe tat very well)…but everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion…if u totally disagree with wat I wrote abt the movie…tat u r an absolutely lover of Angel (when there are many more in heaven who r much much better-looking than him)…u r welcome to retaliate with ur words…n words onli…tat is powerful enough to kill…don’t use rotten vegetables…pigs eat them…don’t waste pig food…humans waste enough on their own already…Talkin abt food…here is a personal recommendation for u guys to go watch Over The Hedge…a much better movie n a more hilarious one…deshou?…:)

The last day of 19

Everybody hates u? Nah…not everybody knows who u r…XD…this is definitely a line tat can cheer u up…then again…it can make u pretty upset if u were tinking along the lines of “tat means if everybody noe me…they all will hate me!”……however…in such cases…my advice would be to not tink too much…since this form of tinking is really a waste of braincells…

Actually I did two entries before this one…but I do not intend to put it online since I did both entries in a wrong mood (it's wrong…so very wrong)…which I later felt has defeated the purpose of my blog…so yah…u guys will nvr noe wat I wrote for the past 2 days…hee :p

The pc show is back…n it starts today…but I'm not going…cos I have ethg I need for sch n pleasure…however I'm rather disappointed at my labtop tat I got last year…although it was a present, I still felt the pain in the pocket cos the system is not cheap but it's rather lousy…the hard drive gets heated very easily…which I was told when I sent it for repair tat it will damage the hard drive…but there is nthg u can do abt the heating up of the hard drive…as told by the ppl there…really!…I felt tat I've suffered a rip-off…at least it was on warranty…though it is very BOTHERING to hving find the centre for repair n hving to collect thereafter……I suddenly feel like getting a Sony Vaio…but it's more of a want than a need…so…let's wait 2 more years

On the otherhand…not buying the wanted-system allows me to save $$ for my trip to Japan….tat is…if I'm really going…can't believe how come I can hv a friend who took 6 months n still cannot make up her mind…we intended to go in May after the exams…but it keeps getting pushed back…it now seems she wants to go in Jul…where Japan is burning hot…n killer…haiz…I'm just tryin to find the cheapest airfares to fly there…tiring man…to keep up with a person like here…-_-!!!…yah…so me working now is for the trip to
Tokyo…of course…I've realized tat my pay is quite low…so if I do go…I'll probably spent every cent of my salary…haiz…work for 2 months…spend in 1 week…L…there's got to be a better way…

I somehow finally understood the meaning of fellowship n the need for it…note in this case tat I used need n not want…becos it's really a need to do so…fellowship means gathering with ur fellow members who care for u…it's not really to get influenced but more of teaching urself social skills n to learn tat the world does not revolve around u only…sadly, some ppl still tink so…so if they are upset or angry…they want the whole world to fall along with them…which I feel…is rather selfish (sorry to all the fishmongers…pls continue with ur lives…we r dependent on ur daily catches…serial!!)…being in fellowship teaches care and concern for others…n to an extend…a degree of tolerance…ok…I may be mixing with a bunch of kids but tat doesn't mean tat kids do not noe athg…some r actually much more spiritually mature then me…(yes…it is nthg to be ashamed of even if ur juniors are better than u spiritually…just buck up lah)…so I really do enjoy my time with them…hope ppl will appreciate fellowships like how I do….or even better…XD